Brave and Wise

It's not an easy task to listen for words that may help to define us.  It takes some practice in listening and discerning.  and then there is a certain amount of letting go of control.  

I was pretty sure that I wanted my words for the next year to be something like abundance and happiness - and maybe it will end up that way - but what came to me was a little different.

This year on Christmas morning I found myself in a store in the Sun Country terminal at LAX - waiting (for 2 hours) for a flight to MN for our Christmas break.  We had decided it would be better to be extra early than stress about traffic.  So to pass the time I was browsing in the store and looking for a comb for my daughter who has some of the most strong-willed hair of anyone I know.  

As I walked up to the register a little old chinese lady hurried behind the counter and greeted me with a kind smile and a "Merry Christmas", which at first caught me a little off guard, since I just didn't expect it (even on Christmas Day).  

I replied with a smile and a "Merry Christmas to you". 

Her eyes twinkled at me as she said joyfully "and a happy New Year"

Again - I was not ready for that.  I must have needed coffee. I responded with a smile, "and Happy New Year to you, too."  I got ready to give her my card...

But she was not finished - she looked my right in the eye and said "And be Brave, and Wise"

Who says things like that, I thought to myself, while at the same time thinking she must be very intuitive..."Thank you - those are good words"

Then very purposefully she said - "Not enough girls are brave and wise - and I think you could be brave and wise - I think more of us need to be."

I am sure there were a few tears that came to my eyes - she was so earnest in her words and I was moved that she would bless me with these words.  I responded as best I could - "Thank you, that was an amazing blessing.  YOU are a blessing." I said as I gently touched her arm - then I smiled and left.

I have now had a few days to savor these words - as I spend time with my "tribe of origin".  I am honored that these are the ones that have come to me.  I am looking forward to looking for ways they will play out in my life.

In the meantime I am shaping the new year around goals and activities that will help me live into being Brave and Wise (and quite frankly that alone feels a little brave and a little wise).

What are things that you would define or Brave or Wise?

Entering the New Year

My friend Desta has a tradition of focusing on a word for the year; a word that is nourishing and challenging, one to wrestle and grow with. She has been inviting her friends and acquaintances to choose a word (or 2) for the year.

You are now officially invited to pick a word for the year.  In a way it is like a new year’s resolution – a thought one can grow into or a feeling to nourish.  Last year I lived with the word “Tribe”, with the idea of recognizing and naming the people around me who play a role in shaping my life and the life of my family. 

  

Would you like to join in the adventure?  A word which chooses us has the potential to transform us. Spend some time asking yourself/God for your word. Let it pick you.

What might your word be for 2014? Let me know when one has picked you!  Comment below...

This year my words were gifted to me in an interesting way (you can read about it in my post on Jan 1, 2014)

Blessings to you in the new year (whenever that may start).

7 ways to Slow down and Savor the Day

I am an early morning person.  Or at least I used to be and still want to believe that I am.  The thing about early morning is that the air seems a little more fresh.  The moisture from the dew teases out the scents of the flowers and the trees.  the quiet of the morning allows one to hear the birds and the wind and focus more on the softness of the breeze rather than the rush of the day.  It's a break from the fast pace of life, a few moments to breathe into the day.  A few moments that there is that quiet time to enjoy God's creation and listen to where the Spirit calls us.

As we enter into middle of summer and the rush of adventures and vacations and travels around the country its easy to forget to breathe.  We seek the rush of adventure and experiences, we take hundreds of pictures to post on facebook, twitter, instagram, tumblr and the like.

In the midst of it all I invite you into the morning.  If you are not an early morning person, try getting up just once a week to see the sunrise.  (if you wait a few more weeks it comes up later). If you are an early morning person take a few extra moments to lay in bed and listen to the birds outside your window.  Or head out for a short walk and notice the silent moments of the morning.

Here are 10 things you can do in the morning to help you slow down and savor the day 

(most of these can take less than 10 minutes)

1 - Breathe - God's breath moves through us, give us life, animates us... before you go anywhere - or even get out a bed, take a few moments to breathe deeply.  It helps of you place your hands on your abdomen and allow your breath to fill up your belly.  Breathe in 3 times and then allow your breath to slow notice how the air moves through you.  Breathing in this way right away in the morning allows more oxygen to get to your muscles and organs and is a good reminder that your can bring that early morning calm back to yourself throughout the day.

2 - Yoga - Honoring our bodies and how God has created us to move is often a helpful way to start the day.  Gently moving our bodies through Yoga (stretching and breathing) invites our bodies into the day  One great series of movements is called Sun Salutations

3 - Slow walk - this is not the a heart raising workout - but a slow intentional walk of noticing.  Go out for a walk and notice what you hear, what you see, what you smell.  Savor the day one moment at a time

4 - Watch the Sunrise - We so often pause to watch the sun set over the ocean in Southern California - but very few of us get up and find a good place to watch the sunrise over the hills.  While it is easy to see then the sun goes down, there is something much more deliberate and intentional about waiting for the sun to appear.  Bring a cup of coffee, or tea and a friend and sit in the quiet as you wait together for the sunrise.  Or go by yourself, meditate and breathe while you wait.

 

5 - Drink a cup of tea - I know, I know, drinking coffee in the morning is so much the norm.  However, there is a slowing practice that comes with making and drinking tea.  and if you don't like tea a bit of hot water lemon and honey works really well to clear out your digestive system and prepare you for the day.

6 - Journal - Journalling in the morning is very different than any other time of day.  our minds are still a little foggy, our dreams still swirl in our heads.  And for all the swirling and fogginess it tends to be the time of day when we have the most clarity.  The chatter of the rest of the world hasn't yet had time to clutter our minds.  So journal your dreams, your thoughts, your prayers for the day.  Write down a focus for your day - not a to do list, but a to be list.  (mine generally is something like - "be thankful", or "be kind", or "be fully engaged in meetings"...

7 - Meditate - or pray, or sit in silence...whatever you want to call this.  The quiet of the morning is a great time to be able to listen to where your life is call you, or where the Holy Spirit is leading you. Let your mind soften, sit in silence and listen.

It won't be too long before we start noticing how much shorter the days are, before we need to start planning for fall (school, programs, missions).  

Take some time to enjoy the peace the Mid-Summer brings.

(re-posted on www.tlcventura.blogspot.com)

Wednesday Wellness Tip #2 - Schedule

Now that you know where you are - you might have some ideas of where you would like to go next.  Setting goals is a great way to get started.  But if you are anything like me unless you are willing to make time in your schedule to work toward those goals it will not work.

Even if you don't know where to start - set some time aside during your day to research better health in the areas that you would like to pursue.

I have been slowly keeping track of my food intake and my workouts this past week on SparkPeople.  It takes some work to get everything entered, but worth it so far.

The hardest part for me (since I work from home and on my own a lot) it setting and sticking to a schedule.  I have however found that the more I have a consistent rhythm in my day the more I get accomplished.  Here is one example . . . from PBS Kids Go  which I think is helpful no matter where you are in life as a basic tool. or you can even do something more simple like this . . .

 6:00 wake -up
        journal (20+ min)
        work-out (40+min)
7:30  breakfast
         shower and get dressed
8:30  Out the door (or to your desk to work)
          take a 10-15 minute break mid-morning to stretch/walk/let your mind rest
           (eat an apple or some almonds)
12:30  lunch
           afternoon errands
3:30     Play with kids and/or friends - or find a fun thing at work to do with co-workers
5:30    make dinner
6:00   Eat with family/friends
6:30   clean-up
          read/write/watch TV
          get ready for bed.
10:00 lights out

(you can put the amount of time in - or the time of day, which ever is more helpful to you)

What ever you do - make it work for you and then note that not everyday (week/year) will be the same, the goal is to find a rhythm that works best for you right now in life and then learn how you can make your schedule shift and change to your goals, (and interests, social life, self-care).

Have Fun!!!

Wednesday Wellness Tip #1 Back to the Basics - Tracking

One of the many things we learn in life is that when you want to get somewhere it is helpful to know your starting point.  This is just as true in terms of wellness as it is of driving from point a to point b.

Whether we are trying to eat right or train for that 5K (10K or Ironman), or just simply finding more joy in life, it is helpful to trade food, workouts and even things we are thankful for.

I have found that this part is vitally important, but as simple as it seems, it is not so simple to keep up with it.  Maybe because it seems too simple.  Isn't life just like that?  We "poo poo" the simple things thinking if we challenge ourselves more we will get better results.

So I invite you to start tracking where you are.  Get a lay of your wellness landscape.  Know yourself, listen to your body.

A basic tool for this is using a simple rating scale for your wellness in terms of physical, emotional, mental and spiritual self.  Use the following either when you get up in the morning or before you go to bed to get an idea of there you are this week.  Then decide what you really would like to change (or strengthen).

Physical Wellness - "I have all the energy I need for today" 10=highly agree to 1=no energy at all

Emotional Wellness - "I am feeling very good about myself" 10=highly agree to 1=I don't like myself at all

Mental Wellness - "I am confident in what I know" 10=highly agree to 1= I am not sure about anything

Spiritual Wellness - "I feel very connected to the world (and people) around me" 10=highly agree to 1= I have not connections at all

Check back next week for ideas on how to strengthen your wellness quotient.

Gratitude and Optimism

One of the wonderful outcomes in the practice of Happiness or being joyful is that when one sets the intention to practice being happy and takes a few steps in the practice the level of happiness rises exponentially.  (you can check out some of the stats in Robert Holden's book Be Happy)  Needless to say as I have started some work on Gratitude and Optimism I am at least starting to feel a little happier.  Or maybe I should say I am starting to feel a little more in focus and learning that I have power over my emotions.  

So this week I am working on being intentional about letting people know I appreciate them.  I have been writing notes, giving gifts (which seems a little more simple since it is the Holiday season) making sure to stop and smile.  I also have been keeping a gratitude journal (like Oprah recommenced a few years back).  In addition to the gratitude, I have been working on optimism.  This is one I am really good at, the challenge is for me to stay there - and stay there realistically.

There is an old Cherokee Legend called "The Wolves Within" that I have been reminded of a lot lately as I am more intentional on this path of being a happier person.  

An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, "Let me tell you a story.

I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do.  But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times." 


He continued, "It is as if there are two wolves inside me. One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.

But the other wolf, ah! He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger,for his anger will change nothing.

Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit."

The boy looked intently into his Grandfather's eyes and asked, "Which one wins, Grandfather?" 


The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, "The one I feed."

Which one are you feeding?  And what do you feed it?

Practicing Happiness

My husband is a perpetually happy guy.  There is not much that gets him down and his happiness seems so effortless.  Although I treasure my vast array of emotions there are most definitely times when I long to have that effortless "happy" feeling.  I believe that happiness is not an end goal, but something that we experience in moments, great and small, throughout life.  I also believe that happiness is a practice that we can put into place and the more we live into our happiness the more it becomes ingrained in who we are.

I ran across an article earlier this week 12 Things to Make you Happy.  As I read through it I thought that these would be some great practices to put to work now through the holidays and continue through the new year. (here is the short form)

1. Express gratitude.
2. Cultivate optimism. 
3. Avoid over-thinking and social comparison. 
4. Practice acts of kindness. 
5. Nurture social relationships.
6. Develop strategies for coping. 
7. Learn to forgive. 
8. Increase flow experiences. 
9. Savor life’s joys. 
10. Commit to your goals. 
11. Practice spirituality.
12. Take care of your body.

Although we may all order these differently since our personalities/values/priorities are so very different I invite you to join me in this journey of discovery and practicing happiness.  Pick one or two to start with and enjoy the experience.